Stoke’s defeat to Bristol was arguably self-inflicted with Joe Allen’s red card. This is how it unfolded (& fell apart) in real time:
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Nathan Jones – the man with the reputation of radically changing the side every week – has radically changed the side again. FOUR players – WHO DIDN’T EVEN FEATURE AGAINST BIRMINGHAM – start, including Badou Ndiaye who hasn’t played for Stoke since I was in short trousers. He’s been at Galatasaray for a season & playing for Senegal in the Africa Cup. Apart from a brief glimpse at the beginning of last season (claims Rowett), he probably thinks we’re still in the Premier League! Get this, he replaces legend Peter Etebo! Also starting (who didn’t go Birmingham) are Jack “fingers&thumbs” Butland, Carter-Vickers, & the other Tommy (Edwards, that is). Danny Batth will sit on the bench and wonder at a midfield diamond of Capt Joe Allen, Ndiaye, Clucas & Ince. More a graphite pencil than a diamond, methinks…
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0.44 Lindsay bundled over sheltering the ball – asking for it, says the ref, unsympathetically.
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2.53 Jack does something dodgy…a volleyed clearance from a back pass.
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3.49 1-0 !!!! Clucas blasts home after Edwards’ corner drifts all the way to Indi, who sets up Sam. He fails to be distracted by Bristol keeper Bentley, who is now regretting leaving his goalie kit in the wash with his wife’s red & purple pants.
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11.45 RED CARD as Capt Joe Allen decides to go recklessly (& unnecessarily) into a tackle with his foot up. That might be the end of the diamond for today. “Late for the tackle with no intent or malice as he catches Brownhill” say the club’s Twitter feed. Really?
17.45 Bristol make a substitution, but not the poleaxed Capt Brownhill, who seems perfectly Ok now. And Ashley Williams receiving little love on his return to Stoke.
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20.55 Clucas & McClean are somehow denied by the pants-left-in-wash keeper. Even Lee Gregory carves out a couple of chances. 5th place Bristol confused why bottom club Stoke won’t roll over for them. Even Tom Ince has broken a sweat plus Jack is pulling off the saves now!
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25.55 Ashley Williams starting to play with the sort of flare we never saw at Stoke. But it’s Lee Gregory who is putting in the shift of the day so far.
34.10 As Brownhill is soundly booed as he takes a poor corner, there is something quite alarming by the thin looking Stoke crowd. The figure we will be given will probably include absent season-ticket holders + tickets sold to those who never intended to attend but just liked waving tickets around at the office. It looks below 20,000, but the official figure will probably be c23,000.
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45+3 Temporarily-off-the-bottom Stoke 1 Full-11-players-still-on-the-pitch Bristol 0
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49.10 Attendance given as a predictable 22357, but the Stoke board will be looking around at the mass of empty seats.
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50.25 Ndiaye charges through, with Brownhill actually holding his hand. As Badou gets a shot off, ref gives nothing. Sexual harassment, say I.
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54.10 1-1 ! As Stoke are cut open like a kipper, with a cross chipped in from Stoke’s left, and headed home by Diedhiou. Undeserved, but Stoke’s defence is so fragile. Similar to Birmingham equaliser.
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57.20 Carter-Vickers topples over but is still able to head the ball clear from a prostrate position…
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59.56 Brownhills finally yellowed for clattering Clucas right in front of Nathan. Crowd love it!
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61.32 1-2 !! Weird as ball cleared off line…then linesman (not ref) gives the goal after protestations! Never seen the like. Credited to Eliasson initially, it’s finally given to Edwards as an own-goal. Then an explosion from the away end – no flare, just an extremely loud bang! Sign of just how low Stoke have fallen. Shocking.
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67.54 After Etebo replaces Ince, Tyrese then comes on for McClean. Diedhiou is then yellowed for kicking a placed free-kick away like a spoilt child.
76.32 Scott Hogan comes on but will find Lee Gregory a hard act to follow. No chance.
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80.10 Longest wait for a yellow card goes to Ndiaye, who protests till he’s blue in the face. He could talk himself off the pitch at this rate…
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86.58 Bristol fans decide that there’ll be a sacking in the morning. have they heard something?
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90+4 Finally the ref puts an end to this chaos. Stoke 1 Bristol City (with 11 men) 2
